10 most stupid questions people ask

10 most stupid questions people usually ask in obvious situations and the possible answers you can give in italics,


1. At the movies: When you meet acquaintances/friends...

"Hey, what are you doing here?"

Dont u know, I sell tickets in black over here..


2. In the bus: A heavy lady wearing pointed high-heeled shoes steps on your feet...

"Sorry, did that hurt?"

No, not at all, I'm on local anesthesia.....why don't you try again.


3. At a funeral: One of the teary-eyed people ask...

"Why, why him, of all people"

Why? Would it rather have been you?


4. At a restaurant: When you ask the waiter

Is the "Butter Paneer Masala" good??

No, its terrible and made of adulterated cement. We occassionaly also spit in it.


5. At a family get-together: When some distant aunt meets you after years...

"Munna, Chickoo, you've become so big".

Well you haven't particularly shrunk yourself.


6. When a friend announces her wedding, and you ask...

"Is the guy you're marrying good?"

No,he's a miserable wife-beating , insensitive lout...it's just the money.


7. When you get woken up at midnight by a phone call...

"Sorry. were you sleeping?"

No. I was doing research on whether the Zulu tribes in Africa marry or not. You thought I was sleeping....you dumb witted moron.


8. When you see a friend/colleague with evidently shorter hair...

"Hey have you had a haircut?"

No, its autumn and I'm shedding......


9. At the dentist when he's sticking pointed objects in your mouth...

"Tell me if it hurts?"

No it wont. It will just bleed.


10. You are smoking a cigarette and a cute woman asks...

"Oh, so you smoke"

Gosh, it's a miracle .......it was a piece of chalk and now it's in flames!!!

- courtesy e-mail from a friend